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Not long ago I really started to think about the dursleys myself, so it was very interesting to read this. Good job writing this! :-)

I like your essay. . Petunia, to me, had a clean house because it was something she could control. As for the garden, they suffered from the draught in OoTP, so they didn't have the best garden. Petunia's sisterhood was broken a least a year before Lily got her letter. It was broken when Snape showed up. Not only did he tell Lily that she was a witch, he accepted her completely. This was the first change, and Petunia hated it. Then when Lily got her letter, Petunia wanted to join her and was rejected by Dumbledore.
this was the second change. Also, their parents were so proud of Lily because she was a witch, instead of focusing attention on Petunia, reassuring her that they still loved her even though she wasn't magical; this was another change. Lily came home during holidays and summers showing off what she had learned, to the delight of her parents and hatred from Petunia. Another change came when Lily started dating James.
As for taking in Harry out of love, well I don't know if it was love or just an obligation. Petunia reminded Vernon of this in OoTP when he wanted to kick Harry out. "the neighbors will talk".
They Had to take him in. this was re-enforced by Dumbledore's Howler.
I did hate them at first, for the way they treated Harry, but, I also feel sorry for them. Petunia knew Harry would have problems, not only when he was first growing up, but because of the threat of Voldemort. She could have been kinder to him.